I'm Back

I arrived back from the HolyLand 2 days ago. The trip was wonderful. I had a really wonderful time. I got to spend some nice time with my sister, meet new people, ALMOST win a poker tournament(no actually gambling involved - but glad i didn't win as i was a visitor and it would have been very awkward..coming in 2nd was awkward enough), and last but certainly not least, visit the most sacred of Bahai Holy Places. It was so relaxing and good for my spirit.

Also, I managed (for most of the trip) to be pretty good in terms of what I ate and how much, etc., and Haifa is a city on the mountain so we walked ALL the time up and down very steep inclines. I am happy to say to date I have lost almost 4 kilos...I am still determined to keep it up. As soon as I got back home, I immediately went back to following my diet 100%(was a bit hard to do while travelling) and even went to the gym on my first day back at work. I feel really proud and think I can definitely meet my goals, just need to keep up my determination and hard work.

This trip came at the perfect time for me. It was just what I needed. Best of all, in about a month and a half I have another wonderful trip coming up which I can look forward to. I get to spend a month at home with my family (just us), it will be so great, I just know it!!! I can't wait!!! I will miss my doggie, but i'm sure i'll get used to it.

I said prayers and thought of most of my friends while in Israel. I also prayed for some of my life situations. Now I just have to wait and see what happens. I truly believe a lot of it is in God's hands (like people who are ill, their healing, etc..) and there isn't a whole lot I can do but have Faith and pray i am able to understand God's will, whatever It may be. Time will tell!

That's my update for now.

Headed to the Holy Land

P and I are going to Haifa tomorrow. We will be there for one week. It couldn't come at a better time for me. I am sure there are many factors, but I have felt quite down lately. There have been some frustrations (my apartment situation in Atlanta), fears(a very dear family member is not well), longing (i miss my family and friends), and cabin fever to name a few (i haven't left sweden in about 8 months). I realize that I have much to be grateful for, but I am also human, we all have our own trials and tribulations and these are a few of mine which have sort of been a blow to my spirits lately. So, as I said, this trip couldn't come at a better time.

I will see my beloved sister, have some time away with my hubby to reconnect, and best of all, be close to my Lord. I am looking forward to pouring my heart out, praying for my loved ones and turning inwards a bit to focus on my soul and its needs spiritually.

On a completely unrelated and more positive note, I have been very good with my weight loss endeavours. I have stuck to my diet quite faithfully and my exercise regime. In fact, in the last week there have been about 4 occassions/events I have attended which could have been cause for great temptation, but I was resolute in my actions and I did not give in. I haven't cheated even once. I feel quite proud of myself for that. I am leading a healthy lifestyle and plan to keep it up. I have also lost 2 kilos in the process and hope to continue to lose. So this is good for my spirits for sure..and i'm sure as i see more success I will become even happier.

I also got to see my new niece this weekend(my brother in law's baby) and that was so wonderful. She is so cute and I got to hold her and it was just very nice. I am so happy for my brother and sister in law and hope that P and I will get to spend some more quality time with them and the baby. She is too precious to not see often!

I will try and blog some more about my trip when I return. In the meantime, my friends will all be in my thoughts and prayers while in the Holy Land!

Getting Back on Track

Well I finally put my efforts where my thoughts have been for a while now. I set my mind into discipline-mode, which I am actually quite good at when I make the effort, and started a diet on Sunday. I also started exercising regularly. I have lost one pound so far. Hey its a start!!!But I feel good about myself, my ability to achieve my overall goal for weight loss and a healthier lifestyle. I also went in for an appointment this morning to have my cholesterol checked and some other key health factors. I have a meeting with the doctor next week to go over my results. I am certain this will all help me with my goals. So this part of my life feels pretty good right now.

Unfortunately, i have some issues with my apartment in the states that have come up which are causing me unnecessary stress. Long story short, my tenant is gone, and I need to find a new one, but my agent(whose services haven't been the best in terms of communication) is holding me up and not sending me necessary paperwork to get the apartment listed. The more time that passes, the more stress I feel because i NEED to get a tenant in there asap, as I REALLY can't afford to pay for the unit for much longer...It's just such a crappy situation, but I know a lot of people are much worse off than I am so I try not to fret over it so much!!! If you know of anyone who needs to rent a nice apartment in Atlanta, please let me know!!!

In about a week and half I am going to visit my sister and visit the Bahai Holyland. P and I are really looking forward to the trip. I will get to spend time with my sister which is always a good thing, and I can feel some spiritual rejuvination by just feeling closer to my Lord somehow. It is coming at the perfect time for me!

There isn't a whole lot else going on. I have been quite busy at work which is a good thing, though its been a bit stressful, but its ok, better than being bored. I am hoping to see my niece again this weekend(she was born 2 weeks ago), but we'll see..not sure yet, though it would make me very happy. Baby L is quite the cutiepie!!! Hope you guys(not sure who all reads this thing, but i have a few close friends who do) are doing ok!!!

The Power of Smell

P recently made a trip back to the states, a very brief one, and brought me back some things I had asked for. One of the items he purchased was a shower gel from Victoria's secret. The gel is called "pear glaze". The first time I used it, as soon as I opened the bottle and squeezed out some of the gel, when I got my first whiff of the smell, I really went back to a very happy place in my memories...When I was in my teens, for one of my birthdays, a friend gave me a set of lotions and in it was a pear shower gel which smelled just like the one P got me recently. It's so amazing to me how a smell can bring back so many memories. I remembered living at home in PR, with my parents and just took me back to a very wonderful time...

I remember as a child, when my dad would go on business trips, I would go and smell his clothes because they reminded me of him. I did the same thing, many years later, when P and I lived apart during the first two years of our marriage. I would smell his clothes and it would remind me of him...I just am amazed by the power of smell and what a wonderful sense it really is. Granted, one could associate certain smells with not so nice memories, but in my case, its mostly with very good memories. The best part is, it doesn't get old. Meaning anytime I use the shower gel, my thoughts drift back to memories of living at home and being a carefree teenager.

Self-help

Several weeks ago I blogged about some personal struggles and my intention to help improve my physical appearance. The key word in this whole thing is struggle, because it is one. I haven't been terribly good. I was good the first two weeks, but then work got really tough and I stopped trying. It's kind of like getting on the horse, falling off, then trying to get back up. That is what I am going to do. I haven't given up on myself, which is good I guess, but not enough I know. I wonder why it is that for some people they are fully capable of helping others, but its so hard to help themselves. Somehow life is just ironic that way. Or sometimes people are so kind to others and loving, but with those nearest and dearest they are distant...I don't really understand certain ironies in life....

But life certainly is quite ironic!!! Take me for example, the only thing I really ever, truly cared about in my life is family, especially being around my own family, parents, sister, cousins, uncles, etc...But I now live half way around the world from most of them. In a million years, I don't think i could have imagined that would have been the case. Another irony, my whole life I dreamt of living in the US, it was my desire ever since I left it as a small child, yet once again, I had to go and fall in love with a European who had no desire to live in the US...Life is too ironic!!!

I guess in a lot of cases these ironic situations can be personal tests which help to build character if you deal with them appropriately and choose to grow from the situation somehow. Its amazing how much power we hold in our own hands, yet we don't choose to do anything with it. I mean happiness, if you think about it, is simply a state of mind. Sure it is impacted by your surroundings, environment, etc. , but we can decide to be happy or not. it's simple as that, yet it isn't...I mean obviously, as a deeply religious person, I believe true happiness comes from a sense of nearness to God, but that aside, just practical happiness in terms of your life situation etc..you can choose to be or not to be. You can make lemonade out of lemons life throws you or you can just see a bunch of sour lemons and grunt about it...It's easier said than done I know, but at the end of the day, it is possible. I just need to keep reminding myself of that on days when I see sour lemons thrown at me instead of sweet oranges...

Sad Day

Today is a sad day for me because one of my co-worker's whom I have grown quite fond of is leaving the company. Today is her last day, in fact its her last few minutes here I believe. It feels like what once use to be a bustling, noisy office place has become quite and almost desolate. So many people have left that this place is a completely different place from what it was when I first started here. It's a bit sad, especially when the weather is grey outside as it has been for the past month here. I am really going to miss my co-worker. Her name is Terese and I really like her a lot. Every day when I would come into work we would chat and share stories about stuff. I feel like I am losing a friend, even though I hope to keep in touch with her. It stinks saying goodbye to people you are fond of. Especially if you don't have too many friends around, it really stinks!

I feel like so many people I have grown fond of over the years, I have had to say goodbye to! I guess I am just feeling a bit nostalgic for a past life. I would give anything to be back in my freshman year of college, just for a week and reexperience the fun times with friends. I had such a wonderful time my first year with my Bahai friends in Atlanta and that feeling of belonging. We were a special group of friends and we have since drifted to different parts of the world, but in that time it was so nice. Hanging out at Ladan's apartment on the weekend, Tali and Sami coming down from gainesville, nase coming in late from his 12 hr shift at CNN, adrian just dropping by, all of us just chilling together... I loved that time in my life!!! At least I have the memories of it all, and some pictures to remind me if I do forget! I miss you guys!!!

A few of my favorite things

Here is a list of a few of my favorite things, in no particular order:

1)The Baha'i Faith and how blessed my life has been because of it!
2)Catching up with good friends and having that feeling that no time has passed at all since you last saw or spoke with each other.
3)My dad's laughter.
4)My mom's laughter.
5)My husband's laughter when I say something that makes him crack a smile.
6)My dog Bebo and all of his adorable quirks!!!
7)When my sister and I crack up together over an old memory or just something we find funny.
8)Laughing so hard it hurts and I have to stop cause i feel an asthma attack coming on.
9)Cousin Reunions!!!
10)Reading a good book and staying up all night cause I can't stop turning the pages.
11)Mint Chocolate Chip Icecream(especially from baskin robins).
12)Driving.
13)Watching a really great movie!
14)Visiting my family.
15)My mom's homecooking, NOTHING is better, hands down!!!